Derek Pakora

Chicken fried in a spicy batter or something else?

I don’t wish to write many posts that are in some way negative. But sometimes you come across something so bad it would be a disservice to mankind not to mention it for fear that somebody else might succumb to the same horrific fate.

In a rash moment of ‘what’s for dinner’ blindness Jo bought some take out curry from one of the leading supermarkets. Amongst the odds and sods were a perfectly serviceable onion bhaji and a vegetable samosa. But there was also something else. Something, described without irony, as a chicken pakora… A cursory glance indicated nothing untoward, it looked like a decent chunk of chicken deep fried in a golden spicy batter (see picture, you’d be mislead too right?). A more prolonged examination revealed something else. Bread. Not Naan, not paratha, not chapati or any other unleavened Asian breads, but two pieces of nasty white loaf cut into triangles and deep fried (admittedly in a golden spicy batter!). In between the bread was what I can only assume is the legal minimum amount of chicken required for it to be classified as a chicken dish.

At first I thought this may have been a more authentic rendition of a pakora. If it is I cannot find any reference to it online. I can only assume this is an austerity pakora designed to be entered into the filthiest Indian sundry category of the misleadingly labelled food awards 2012. It should win. No contest. It had the chance to redeem itself by being one of those things that sounds terrible but is in fact good in bad kind of way (it may have been better marketed as a deep fried chicken tikka club sandwhich). It didn’t and will never be one of those things.

It went on the bin. For a man who hates to throw food away this was perhaps the most damning thing of all.

Not much chicken in here...
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3 thoughts on “Derek Pakora

  1. Had a similar experience with some reprehensible supermarket food, so I took it back. The assistant kindly asked me if I wanted a replacement. I pointed out that if I didn’t like it the first time, they were hardly likely to have drastically improved the recipe in the last few days, possibly by means of telepathic communication with my tastebuds. They refuded my money. Keep up the good work, Richard.
    This week’s acronym:
    Package any kind of repugnant animal snack.

    1. Maybe she was trying to lure you into some sort of never ending cycle of purchasing and returning! You were wise to stand your ground! We should have returned the Pakora and demanded something more authentic instead!

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